This is a personal emotional cycle I am desperately trying to break. It's a struggle I don't talk about. It's not something others want to hear. Mark Twain said "We are like the moon, we all have our dark side that we never show to anybody."
Medicine is helping.
Giving myself a break is helping.
Sharing my struggle (which is SO VERY HARD!) is helping.
Putting myself on my own 'To Do' list is helping.
I spoke with an older man on the flight back from Seattle recently and asked why he was away from home so often (he was in Seattle for 2 months and headed home for ten days before venturing to Jamaica). He joyfully replied "Just living Life!" I surprised myself by responding "Well no one else is going to do it for you!" And it's true. No one else is going to live my life for me.
So I start fresh.
I'll keep you posted!